Book Log: "Confessions of Georgia Nicholson" by Louise Rennison

Part A: Book Summary

Confessions of Georgia Nicolson: Angus, Thongs and Full-Frontal Snogging
by Louise Rennison
Humor Book
Avon Books, 2004, 245p, $13.99
ISBN 0-06-057590-5

There comes a time when every girl becomes a woman. Fourteen-year-old Georgia Nicolson thinks she might never make it through. Her nose is too big, her breasts are too small, and her experience with boys is lacking; she fears she's destined to become a lesbian. Georgia provides hilarious commentary of her adolescence, in both a self-deprecating and boastful manner.

Georgia lives with her mother, father, three-year-old sister, Libby, and an evil cat from hell named Agnus. She has a decent relationship with her mother, but distances herself as far as possible from her crude and grouchy father. An example of his fatherly love is when, early in the book, Georgia manages to accidentally shave off her eyebrows. Her father brings family members up to her bedroom to laugh at her. “What am I? A daughter or a fairground attraction?” she muses. (Pg. 23) Life at home is challenging for Georgia, as she's often taking care of Libby, who is often finding new places in Georgia's room to pee and poo. And then there's Agnus, the high-strung Scottish wildcat who eats everything and insists on venturing into Georgia's next-door neighbors' yard daily to stalk their poodle.

As if things at home aren't difficult enough, Georgia and her friends are occupied with this whole “becoming a woman” business. They're experimenting with make-up (Georgia is determined to make her nose look smaller), taking kissing lessons from a boy down the street, and developing obsessions for certain members of the opposite sex (Georgia thinks perhaps she's not a lesbian, after all!).

Jas, Georgia's best friend, begins a relationship with a fellow named Tom. Soon after, Georgia learns about his older brother, Robbie, who she refers to as a Sex God. He's in a band and is four years her elder. However, he has a girlfriend, a character Georgia describes as a “wet.” A “wet,” according to Georgia's glossary in the back of the book, is a “drippy, useless, nerdy idiot.” (This glossary is a very helpful tool provided to explain all of the British lingo Georgia uses throughout the novel.) Georgia sets out on a mission to break up Robbie and the wet, and with the help of Jas and company, achieves her goal.

The book is filled with laugh-out-loud moments, such as when, despite her parents' forbidding, Georgia bleaches a blonde streak into her hair to make her look older. She does this, of course, to impress Robbie, who had previously mentioned that Georgia was too young for him to date. When Agnus goes missing, and Robbie finds him and returns him to Georgia, she makes a play by casually running her fingers through her newly-dyed hair. When she does, the white streak breaks off in her hand! One embarrassing moment after another plagues poor Georgia. Teenage girls will love this book because Georgia shows them how to laugh of such traumatizing events, and because every girl goes through the same awkward transformation that Rennison writes about.

Three quotes:

“...there is no way an author can surprise a reader on every page. Instead, authors sprinkle humor throughout their books.” (Pg. 168) Rennison keeps the tone lively, with lots of jokes on every page. However, the big shockers are reserved for special moments, like when Georgia has to forfeit her tennis match victory and when her blonde streaks breaks off in her hand. Georgia is also cynical enough to not let the humor get out of control. There is a nice balance of ups and downs, although even negative situations are portrayed in a comical fashion.

“Humor is an obvious emotion, and students are genuinely interested in figuring out what causes the to smile or laugh.” (Pg. 169) Georgia writes about so many different things, it's easy for a reader to decide what makes them laugh and what doesn't. She makes jokes about lesbians, transvestites, incest, and many other issues that people can either take seriously or lightly.

“More and more lewd jokes (some approaching a mature recognition of the humor inherent in sex); humor aimed at schools, parents, and other adults in authority ... and grossness piled on even greater grossness.” (Pg. 163) Agnus, Thongs and Full-Frontal Snogging definitely fits this humor book age category. The novel is littered with sex jokes, disrespect for and superiority over adults, and disgusting tidbits (pee, poo, farting, snot, etc.).


Part B: Creative Response
Commentary: Flashback

Reading Confessions was a throw-back to high school for me. I could've been Georgia Nicolson; we're that much alike. I was a part of a clique of girls who fought their way through adolescence by chasing boys, applying way too much make-up, and finding ornery ways to anger our teachers. I was surprised to read Georgia's accounts of what we used to call “Light as a Feather, Stiff as a Board” and “People Pass Out.”

Many times, my girlfriends and I would chose and candidate and then gather around her. She would lie flat on the floor and we would encircle her, each placing two fingers underneath her body. Then we'd spout off some spirit chant, which usually included repeating the words, “Light as a feather, stiff as a board.” Sure enough, the girl would “float” off of the ground, and we'd be freaked totally out. I'm still not sure what “magic” was at work there. Perhaps our overactive adolescent brains made it all up. I wonder if Georgia ever held a séance before. We did once to talk to the ghost of Tupac. Boy, was that interesting.

We also used to play “People Pass Out,” where, as Georgia explains, you bend over, inhale and exhale really deep for a couple of minutes, then stand up and take a step forward. I did this at lunch one day in junior high school, and I managed to successfully make myself pass out. Everything went all gray and swirly, and I heard a lot of buzzing in my ears. When I opened my eyes, I noticed a crowd had gathered, hovering over top of me. I suppose my goal was achieved. Why else would a kid be dumb enough to make themselves pass out if not for the purpose of getting attention?

Another incident Georgia writes about is when her classmates all move their desks back an inch or two throughout class, just to confuse and infuriate the poor teacher. One day in homeroom my freshman year, our class pulled a similar prank. Before our teacher, a short, portly woman named Mrs. Randolf, came in to call the roll, we moved her desk to the middle of the room, inconspicuously surrounded by the smaller student desks. Someone replaced her desk up front with one of these smaller desks, knowing that there was no way in hell that she could fit in it. When she came in to the room, she huffed and puffed about her desk being gone, and we explained that Bob, the janitor, had came in and taken it away so that he could fix a broken leg on it. She proceeded to stuff herself into the tiny student desk as we proceeded to laugh our butts off. Eventually, when she was in the middle of calling roll, she looked up and noticed her desk in the middle of the room. I'll never forget the shade of red her face became at that moment.

Confessions made me miss those goofy high school days and the carefree mentality that came with them. I don't know a teenage girl who wouldn't relate to Georgia's tales of woe. They seem so over-the-top, but in reality, we've all been there.


Part C: Critical Response
Hostility

Georgia shows hostility towards school authorities. She's particularly annoyed by the school's headmistress, whom Georgia refers to as “Slim” given the fact that Slim “weights twenty-five stone . . . at least.” (Pg. 39) The girls launch attacks such as “Operation Sausage” against the administration to relieve their frustrations.

Agnus, the Scottish wildcat brings a bout of hostility to this tale. Georgia explains that “sometimes, he hears the call of the Scottish Highlands.” He's often found eating some random item or attacking either a person or an inanimate object. For example, on page 6, Agnus has a “Call of the Wild” episode and attacks Georgia's tights for no reason whatsoever. She manages to free him from her legs by beating him with a broom.

Georgia becomes particularly hostile when it comes to Lindsay, the girlfriend of Robbie, the Sex God. She repetitively calls her a “wet,” initiates a plan to stalk her, and outrightly attempts to steal her boyfriend.

Exaggeration

Georgia is always exaggerating things, especially when it comes to her flaws. In an early journal entry she writes that 1) “I have one of those under-the-skin spots that will never come to a head but will lurk in a red way for the next two years” and 2) I am very ugly and need to go into an ugly home.” (Pg. 3-4) Her exaggerations seem trivial, however teenage girls are inclined to be hard on themselves regarding their physical appearance. Rennison knows what's going on in the mind of a girl during her transition to womanhood.

Georgia exaggerates about Jackie Matthews' hickey. She says, “She's put about six centimeters of concealer on it and is wearing a scarf ... It's HUGE! What has she been snogging with – a calf?” (Pg. 76) This is just one example of Georgia's exaggerations towards people. Her descriptions of people in her life are over the top, really bringing the characters to life.

After Georgia's father moves to Whangamata for business, her mother strikes up a friendship with the interior decorator she's recently hired. Georgia exaggerates this relationship, blaming her mother for having an affair. When she confronts her mother about it, her mother replies, “Georgia, I know that you like a bit of drama, but I'm afraid that Jem and I are not having a passionate affair.” (Pg. 217) While I personally think Georgia's mother was definitely flirting with Jem, I don't think she was having any sort of an affair. Perhaps because Georgia was in the boy-chasing frame of mind, she thought her mother was, too.

Surprise or Shock

It was hilarious and shocking when Georgia won the tennis match that would advance her to the final round. In triumph, she throws her racket high up into the air. Unfortunately, it comes down on a teacher's head, and Georgia's win is forfeited. (Pg. 191-192)

I was shocked when – out of nowhere – Georgia tells her journal that Robbie has kissed her. It comes as a complete surprise, because as the novel is written in journal format, it's like the reader is learning the gossip after the fact. Georgia hadn't even been interested in going to see Robbie's band play that night, but it's a good thing she did.

The funniest shock in this book happens when Georgia's freshly-dyed blonde streak breaks off in her hand. She had dyed it to look older for Robbie, and when she tries to run her hand through her hair all sexy-like, it simply snaps off! Luckily, Robbie simply replies, “God you're weird,” and kisses her. (Pg. 230)

Word Play

Rennison has created an entire glossary, which is located at the end of the book, dedicated to British slang words that are used throughout the novel. Some of my favorites are “nuddy-pants,” a term meaning “Quite literally ... no pants (Pg. 240),” and “snogging,” which means “kissing (Pg. 244).”

Georgia takes pleasure in nicknaming people in her life. She refers to Robbie as the Sex God, or simply SG. She also calls a couple of administrators at her school Slim and Hawkeye. Her neighbors are Mr. and Mrs. Next Door, or Mr. and Mrs. ND, to name a few.

Instead of your typical English curse words, Rennison uses French as a disguise. Georgia writes muses in French throughout her journal, particularly when she needs a good curse word. Merde seems to be her favorite. Georgia and her friends also embark on La Marche avec Mystery (Pg. 6), where they walk up and down a local street, speaking only French, if for nothing more than to confuse people and produce giggles.


Louise Rennison is has authored a total of 17 Confessions novels to date, including: Dancing in My Nuddy-Pants, Luuurve is a Many Trousered Thing, and Stop in the Name of Pants!